July 27, 2016

29 LIFE LESSONS I LEARNED IN 29 YEARS!

Family

Okay, I’ve been telling myself for years I would start a blog, what’s been holding me back?oh I don’t know… Everything. haha. I have horrible  grammar,spelling sentence structure haha… I don’t have time. blah blah blah blah. All the things I spent to much time thinking about & I could have had a blog finished by now! haha.

So I said to myself last week THIS IS THE YEAR. July 25th 2016.(Happy Birthday all you July Babies!!).. In celebration of turning 29 & my 1 year wedding anniversay I will start my blog!!

As I was reflecting on my past 29 years I thought to myself what better way then to start of 29 things I’ve learned in 29 years to kick of the blog!!!! Here it goes!

1. Live unapologetically!

It took me to long to start living for the things I love verses for everyone else. It took time but now I find so much joy & freedom in just being myself & not allowing the opinions of others effect me.  Which leads me to the next one…
2. Always Be true to you!
Its so easy to get caught up in all the noise around us. The who you should be, how you should act, how you should raise you kids…blah blah blah blah… One day i just said Eff your standards society & started being true to me. Truth is what makes our world unique is that you will have people who will ALWAYS have something to say…good, bad, & in between which  taught me to…
3. Have an open mind!
to learn, to grow, to go outside the thing I call our personal bubble… That doesn’t mean agree with everything, but have an open mind to listen to others and where they are coming from. The beauty of life is in those moments where people can be equally transparent. I’ve learned so much through having an open mind, and ability to be a life learner .. which has also taught me to..
4. Listen more!
It is AMAZING what we can learn from others if we would just Listen.Listen with love & no judgement. I don’t do small talk well..haha I LOVE to hear & learn & listen to the core of people souls, it is there that you find the beauty of peoples hearts. Not in what they do, what car they drive, how much money someone makes but the core of who they are their passions, personalities & more…which of corse leads into the next one.haha
5. Do all things with kindness!!
I promise you’ll love who you become.
I learned really early on that doing things with kindness always filled a part of my heart that nothing else can..There is something so beautiful that happens when people are kind.. I know the opposite reaction for me has left me feeling horrible.. its like an instant gratification & then that feeling in the pit of my stomach of guilt.. along with this i learned..
5.  Communication is key…
Trust me I know, It can be easier said then done  sometimes.  I am a constant work in progress. I think we live in a society that is quick to get angry an react but I believe & have learned if we dig deep enough there is always something deeper behind the initial reaction…Don’t give.. practice.practice.practice.
6. You are perfectly imperfect!
I learned early early on in my life I was so different then most people because I had experienced trauma no child should have ever had to endure. But, I learned a very valuable  lesson to love those parts of me. Loving my imperfections were what made me so unique.
7. Embrace YOU NOW.
I’ll say it over and over again because I like to remind myself as well… but Eff the standards of society!!! Embrace YOU NOW. Embrace all that you are now.. there is so much beauty in who you are as a person  not  what you own or what you look like.  not the car your drive, not your weight, none of that matters …  EMBRACE YOU!
8. Love YOURSELF.

This one is a soft spot for me.. It took a long time to love every part of ME. I mean EVERY PART.. I have always loved the core of who I was but i haven’t always acted or treated myself that way. I carried all my childhood trauma & In a world were everyone has an opinion I lost myself for a little while. Through those experinces I learned to …

9. Be Authentic!

I learned I have so much to offer.  Your Authenticity brings so much to world. I quickly learned I would not be for everyone & The people who loved me were there to stay! which leads me to say..
10. You won’t be everyones cup of beauty or mommy!
I’ve come to find I love the women I am because I have & continue to work my ASS off to become her. Along with self love came accepting I would not be everyones cup of beauty or mommy. I made a promise to myself to be authentic, to be raw & to never again settle for societies standards of anything.
11. MINDSET!!
Do you ever ask yourself about your mindset??? You would be surprised how much our mindset impacts our choices & our perspectives. This one took a lot of trial & error excuses after excuses & trust me. Truth is when hard times hit I would sit & dwell in the sadness for SOOO long & constantly said things like “but if I had, I could”, “but if he would just, I would just..” “but if i had the money, I could …”, or things like ” I am not worthy, I am not pretty, I don’t have…” The list could go on.. I learned when I began to fuel myself with love, affirmations, & started taking Control of my mindset  & changing the way I approached hardship. Things happened!!!
12. Take Care of YOU!
All aspects of you! Taking care of myself especially after having kids felt like a daunting task. I felt guilty at the thought of self care.. Truth is taking care of ME meant that ultimately I was giving them the best gift of all. A healthy momma! A mommy who was intentional about how she cared for herself! I truly believe taking care of ones self is form of self love.  I could have never  expected my children to care for themselves as a adults if i didn’t set an example in their childhood. During this process of learning to take care of myself I also learned to..
13. Forgive.
Forgiveness has always been something that came easy for me. Then I realized I had so much healing to still work through & forgiveness set the foundation of that healing for me. I still have a lot to work through but i feel free! With healing came the boundaries.
14. Boundaries
This was by far the most challenging being that I wanted to please EVERYONE in my life. Also most of the people in my life I was setting boundaries with were people I love. It was it hard yet SO liberating. No one is perfect & often people cross boundaries. I found myself just never saying anything & just feeling hurt.  I started to use my voice. I spoke up. I was loving but firm with my boundaries..
15. Its okay to say No.
Gosh, I cant think of so many moments I wanted to say no but  choose to say yes.. YEARS of YES YES YES.. to the point exhaustion..It’s okay to say NO.. Its okay kindly just say NO to things that make your heart uneasy.I dont mean like an experience but situation that are just not comfortable… but I also think its important to say
16. YES!!!
Say yes to experiences when you can.. If all the ducks are in a row with my babies I say Yes or even better if I can include them I say YES!!! I usually have some sort of funny memory to share afterward. Kids bring a whole new type of experience to things.. if you know what I mean. haha. It’s worth it the moments, & memories. And Once in awhile Ill say yes to little stuff, to another walk to the park, to seconds on ice cream, to that late bed time, & more..
17. Live as if you are a kid.
I dont know about anyone else but my kids have taught so much about life. They have taught me to just live. I am captivated by the way my babies just live life… they are fearless, they imagine, they live in the moments of each day & express laughter, crying,  joy so freely. Live in the moment.
18. Write a bucket List!
One day I said Just Do it! I wrote down some of the smallest things to greatest things. I am surprised with how many I have crossed off!! Its not in the money we spend but the memories we make in each thing.
19. Its NEVER to late to start.
Seriously! Here I am 6 years into this “I want to start a blog” thought & It’s finally happening!!! Check on the bucket list.
20. Learn something New.
I LOVE learning.. Is there anything you have always wanted to learn? Learning something new has become something I LOVE to do…wether its through books, or youtube, or people the resources  & opportunities are endless.

21. Read often.

I read new books bi-weekly, sometimes monthly!. I never in my life imagined I would love reading so much.. I read about any area of my live I want to improve on or learn about.. Mommy books, personal development are my favorite. Find something you enjoy & start readying!

22. Create Healthy Habits!!

I think what we do daily is made up of all these little habits we learned or picked up. Some good, Some that may not benefit us wether its finically, physically etc & the in between. Our habits are a HUGE part of what we become. I use to get so motivated to do a lot of things, getting healthy was a huge one for me. Then, I would stick to it for a week or two, then gave up & would wonder why it didn’t work haha… “Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going.” ― Jim Ryun
23. Everything in life worth having is hard work
DON’T let that stop you!! If you want it work hard for it… Anything I’ve ever wanted worth having have taken HARD work & there are things I’m still working hard to achieve. I enjoy the process most days haha…
24. Make A Dream Board & DREAM BIG!
Success does not happen over night.
Define what your success looks like for you! ITs different for everyone.. & remember it will take lots of little steps to get there… “Don’t give up on your something because of the time it will take to get there… the time will pass either way” 🙂 Isn’t that the truth! Make a dream board.. write out the steps that it takes to get there and most importantly IMPLEMENT them!! KNOWLEDGE IS NOT POWER WITHOUT SOMEONE IMPLEMENTING.. Gosh I had so much knowledge hiding within me but i didn’t do anything but hoard it & would wonder why the EFF nothing was happening..haha well duh..because I was not doing anything about it!
25. WORK TO LIVE NOT LIVE TO WORK!
Man, I know for a while i was working to live.  Man was it exhausting! I was depleted, unhappy eating my emotions. I decided to take a leap and design a life I loved.. Freedom to spend time with my babies & slowly but surely it happened!
26. Have a Hobby!
Gosh, I can’t believe how many hobby’s I have given up because I never allowed myself enough time to really dig deep & explore them. Thankfully I am now picking them up again. but if you have a hobby enjoy it. maybe think twice about giving it up…
27. Stop with the Excuses & Take Control.
Man! This was hard. I often had these moments of “but my life is to hard.” I work full time, I go to school full time, & I am a mom full time & a household manager. Who can relate to the struggle. One day it hit me..Although this was my reality i could do one of two things continue to be unhappy with the circumstance OR I could take control & make a plan & design a life I wanted. I have found that if i want it bad enough I will do what it takes to make it happen…
28. Laugh Often, Give Tons of Kisses, & hugs.
Some Days I feel like the days go by SO quickly and before I know it they are over…So I hug as often as I can remember, give tons of kisses & when in doubt I just add a little laughter. haha.

29. Create a life by design!

Here I am thankfully at the age of 29 finally getting my big girl pants on & continuing to design a life I want. IT hit me one day i could design a life i wanted or be hired to help someone else design & build their dreams . Is it easy HECK NO but its worth it to me!

Okay, There they are 29 things I’ve learned in 29 years!!! I am excited to see what else life has in store for me!

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